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♥ In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, Most Merciful. Praise be to Allah, The Cherisher and Sustainer of the worlds; most Gracious, most Merciful; Master of the Day of Judgement. Thee do we worship, and Thine aid we seek. show us the straight way, the way of those on whom Thou hast bestowed Thy Grace, those whoso (portion) is not wrath, and who go not astray. ♥

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Lost Memory In Time

lalala~~
hati wa ada maaanyak senang oo...
ehe..baru je abis paper ES (English Studies)
td kat Lecture Hall.
direct 3 jam dalam tu...huhu...
bole beku otak.
kekeke~~
tyme tengok soalan ES td pn kira macam susa la juga..
yala, tengok gitu2 ja memang la susa kn..?
cuba try test jawab...?
ada lg ke perkataan "susah" tu?
hehe..kalau korang aku x tau la..
tp, bagi aku... alhamdulillah.
apa yg aku baca semalam n before ni yg kuar..
walaupun bukan suma yg kuar la..hehe
apa pun, aku besyukur sangat...
Allah permudahkan segalanya buat aku.

honestly, kalau dalam kelas ES...
lagi2 bila Mr. John rajin menyoal...
kat sana la aku blur2...
hahahaha.... betul ni...
bukan aku tu yg slalu blur2 dalam kelas..
dalam kelas aku fokus... (blueek...angkat bakul la pula...)
hehehe...
aku blur sbb aku x paham apa yg aku baca...
keh3... padan la ngan muka aku kan..?
haha...

apa pun, since last two weeks i've tried to be me again..
no blur2 in class n no take a nap while lecturer is doing lecture...
hehe.. sorry for those lecturer involved... kekeke~~
especially Madam Vasanthi's class... huhu...
so sorry madam..
i didn't mean to.
i just fall asleep...
anyway, i doesn't matter...
at least, i know what u teach n what we should do.
that will be enough... is it madam?
hehe...
to be honest,
i love the way you teach us...
n the way u approach us in class.
we are very lucky to have u as one of our lecturer madam...
very appreciate it..

oya, another thing i would like to say here...
jeng jeng jenggg...
i used Sri's MacBook....hehehe
mantopz gitu...hehe
Sri ni junior aku...
tp seumur la ngan aku...
so... kiranya jurang tu xda la besar sangat..
lgpun aku da anggap dy macam kawan2 aku yg lain...
no status "junior-senior"
yg ada cuma relationship as friend.
that's cool..

i don't want to mention senior-junior here because i've considered her as my friend.
there's no wrong, right?
plus, we're in same age...
no such thing that she has to respect me as senior that older than her..
no... no... i don't think so...
friend is better... nice... n sweet.. ^^
i love that...

oya, another thing that i would like to say here is
i got many sisters...
of course i got them from my MPPB...
my junior pula ni...ish3...
hehe...
erm... not to bias,
i love al my sisters...
however,
there are some of them that i've considered more than as sister...
why?
because my heart said so...
lalalala~~~

my heart yang want them to be my sister...
not as my adik angkat ok...
but more to be my real sister...
easy to say, just be my sister...
my younger sister....
that's better.
i like that...
hehe...

erm...
what else a...?
hurm... hehe...
holiday is coming soonnnnnnn....
hehe...means, not less than couple weeks.
yeay!!! holidayzzzzz!!!
ngeh3....
tp, tym cuti tu bukannya mama ada d uma...
huhu..
mama p KL pula tu...
wuwuwuwuwuwu....sedeyyyy!!!
T____T

tp xpala...
asalkan mama happy dapat jalan2 p sana...
bagila mama peluang untuk hiburkan hati mama...
kalau sebelum ni,
mama xkan dapat pegi pun...
tepaksa jaga arwah kakak.
hurm... arwah kakak?
alhamdulillah...
aku da dapat terima hakikat yg aku da xda kakak...

kalau sebelum ni...
aku xkan cakap arwah kakak...
aku lebih suka cakap kak oni...
rasa macam dy masih ada lg dengan kami.
walaupun hakikatnya TIDAK!
hurm...kak oni, dik am doakan semoga roh kak oni tenang di dunia baru kakak...
sedih bila teingat kak oni...
sedih sangat...

kalau sebelum ni aku dah terbiasa sangat ngan dy di depan mata aku..
tp skang ni...
dy da xda...
paling2 aku dapat lempiaskan rindu ni bila aku lawat kubur arwah...
tp, setiap kali tu jugak la air mata aku mengalir...
sebak hati aku...
sebak sangat!!!
aku xdapat nk kawal kalau aku da tengok batu nisan yg tercatat
"ALMARHUMAH NURUL AUNI BINTI ISNIRUR"
nk jejak kaki pun aku dah sebak...
ini kn pula aku nk dekat n jenguk kuburan arwah...
xleh tahan...
huhu...

aku teingat tym raya pertama dulu...
lepas ja solat aidilfitri tu...
suma besalaman.
aku mmg terasa sangat bila kami da kurang satu...
walaupun tym tu...
dah lebih 4 bulan dy meninggalkan kami,
tp terasa sangat...
memang aku xdapat nk cover sedih tu...
tp bila tengok mama, abah n sufi kuat...
aku terpaksa juga kuat...
walaupun hati di dalam meronta hiba...

kak oni...
dik rindu ngan kak oni...
rindu sangat...
terlalu banyak rahsia yg kita pendam...
banyak sangat...
am pun banyak sangat buat salah ngan kak oni...
tp kak oni x penah nk amik hati...
sedih kak...
sedih sangat...
am x dapat nk minta ampun ngn kak oni untuk semua salah am..

once tym kat hospital tu...
bila mama cakap kena bersedia untuk melepaskan kak oni...
memang sebak...
xdapat nk buat pada mulanya...
memang mengiyakan apa mama cakap...
tp hati di dalam rasa macam nak gila...
kenapa???
adoi...
kuar pla air mata ni...

huhu... xpela kak oni...
Allah lebih sayangkan kak oni..
Allah xnak kak oni sengara lg ngan suma penyakit yg kak perlu tanggung.
Allah xnk kak oni terseksa batin n perasaan ngan suma cemuhan org2 d sekeliling kak oni...
sorry kak...
sorry sangat2...
dik am memang tersangat banyak buat salah ngan kak oni...
terlalu banyak janji yg dik am x tunaikan...
bila ingat balik... rasa sangat bersalah ngan kak oni...

:'(
sorry kak...
sorry sangat2...
kak oni la kakak yg sangat mengambil berat...
selalu kol am tym am kat sini...
kat IPG ni.....
am sayang kak oni sangat2....
sayang sangat...
i love u kak oni...
love u owez..
Y___Y

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